Lead With Presence: Why Mindful Engagement Is the New Superpower for School Leaders

In the early days of my leadership journey, I wore busyness like a badge of honour. My calendar was packed, my inbox overflowing, and I prided myself on being constantly available—answering messages at all hours, jumping from meeting to meeting, and responding to every “Do you have a sec?” with a smile (even when it was really a 45-minute crisis).

I thought this meant I was doing it right.

But over time, I started noticing things. My decisions were more rushed. My energy was scattered. I was showing up physically—but not fully. Conversations were half-lived, and I began reacting instead of responding.

I realized I was leading on autopilot. And it was costing me.

Not just in energy and effectiveness, but in presence—arguably the most powerful asset any leader has.

The Wake-Up Call: Why Presence Matters More Than Ever

In today’s fast-moving world, being constantly “on” is normalized. We’re praised for our productivity and penalized for pausing. But when we don’t stop to ground ourselves, we lead from a reactive place.

Reactive leadership breaks trust.

It clouds judgment.

It distances us from the people we’re here to serve.

What I’ve learned—through both personal experience and my work with new principals—is that presence isn’t passive. It’s an active choice.

And it’s not about being serene 24/7. It’s about cultivating small, intentional habits that help us lead with clarity, composure, and purpose.

Two Acronyms That Changed My Leadership: STOP and ACT

I remember the first time I came across the STOP technique in One Second Ahead. It felt deceptively simple, almost too easy to work. But I gave it a try during a tense moment in a meeting and immediately noticed the shift.

Here’s how it works:

• Stop

• Take a breath

• Observe what’s happening (in your body, your environment, your emotions)

• Proceed with intention

  
  

It creates a pause between stimulus and response—a space for choice.

Then comes ACT:

• Acknowledge what you’re experiencing

• Choose your response

• Take action deliberately

These two practices have become staples in my leadership toolkit. When I feel overwhelmed, tense, or off-center, I STOP. When it’s time to move forward with clarity, I ACT.

Now, I coach leaders on how to integrate these habits into their daily rhythm—because it’s not just about surviving another day. It’s about leading well within it.

Reclaiming Focus in a World of Noise

There was a time when my phone buzzed constantly. Email pings, meeting alerts, Teams messages—all demanding attention. I convinced myself I was managing it well… until I realized I hadn’t had a single uninterrupted hour in weeks.

The truth? Constant notifications erode our ability to think deeply, connect meaningfully, and create impact.

So I made changes:

• I turned off email previews and message alerts.

• I blocked off “deep work” time on my calendar—and communicated it clearly to my team.

• I created systems to protect focus without sacrificing responsiveness in emergencies.

And I breathed easier.

The quality of my work improved.

So did my mood—and my team’s trust.

Presence isn’t about perfection. It’s about protection—of your energy, your clarity, your ability to lead.

Let’s Talk About Self-Care (For Real)

There’s a quote I stumbled across while watching an interview with Elizabeth Gilbert that changed the way I think about leadership forever:

“The greatest harm we can do to others is to neglect taking care of ourselves.”

That hit me hard.

For years, I thought self-care was something you earned after you got through your to-do list. But here’s the truth: if you’re not doing the internal work—breathing, nourishing your body, creating boundaries—your leadership will suffer.

And yes, spa days and bubble baths are great. But real self-care is about building the conditions that allow you to lead from a place of fullness—not depletion.

Mini Breaks, Major Impact

One of the easiest strategies I now use (and teach) is the mindful mini-break.

Set a timer. Once an hour, pause for just 60 seconds.

Ask yourself:

• Am I breathing deeply or shallowly?

• Do I need a sip of water?

• Am I grounded or racing?

Or, use transitions—between tasks or meetings—as a chance to check in.

A moment of breathing can prevent a day of burnout.

These practices aren’t indulgent. They’re preventative leadership medicine.

One Task at a Time: The Myth of Multitasking

Let me say this clearly: multitasking is a trap.

It promises productivity but delivers stress and sloppiness.

When I shifted from juggling tasks to doing one thing at a time with full attention, everything changed:

• My work quality improved.

• I felt calmer.

• I became a better listener, leader, and decision-maker.

If you want to feel more in control, try slowing down.

Focus fully. Then move on.

It may feel counterintuitive, but it’s incredibly effective.

What I Teach Now (And Wish I’d Known Sooner)

These aren’t just habits—they’re systems for sustainable leadership.

They help us move from reactive to responsive. From drained to grounded.

Inside The Principal’s Collective, I teach new and aspiring leaders how to implement these tools—one micro-shift at a time.

And in my latest book, Beyond the First-Year Principal – 23 Powerful Lessons for the Conscious Leader, I go deeper.

I wrote this book because I remember what it felt like to lead on fumes.

I also know what it takes to step into your role with confidence, calm, and clarity.

You don’t need more to-do lists.

You need support, strategy, and space to breathe.

And that’s what I’m here to help you create.

Let’s Wrap This Up

Start with one mindful habit today:

• Take three deep breaths before your next meeting.

• Turn off one notification.

• Try the STOP technique in a tense moment.

Leadership doesn’t have to be chaotic.

It can be anchored, intentional, and deeply human.

And it all begins with presence.

Want to lead this way, too?

Inside The Principal’s Collective, I coach school leaders who are ready to shift from reactive to conscious leadership. You’ll get access to bite-sized trainings, community support, and monthly resources that actually help you lead well. Join today to get started!